Dating after age 55
"For better or worse, there have been alterations in the beliefs and rules governing courtship, marriage, family formation, divorce, and definitions of accepted gender-related behavior," says Kiner.These changes can seem scary and confusing to someone re-entering the dating pool after many years.It’s important not to make assumptions in dating, especially in the areas of sexual expectations and gender roles. The way you and your date communicate about and focus on the future will dictate compatibility. Many older daters feel more sexually liberated and confident than in days of their insecure, inexperienced youth. Try to avoid talking about exes on the first date — or at least mention them only in passing and without bitterness. If you’re nervous about meeting a stranger for dinner, opt for a daytime date. Sure, you should show up to dinner solo, but don’t start dating again without letting loved ones know.Perhaps the greatest difference between dating in your twenties and dating in your fifties is the way you see and talk about the future. Others are paralyzed by body issues and are terrified of being with someone new. Bitterness is often the greatest criticism from older daters. If you’re overwhelmed by someone’s affections, explain that you need to move slowly. Not every person you date has to be “the one.” Besides, there’s no more ticking of that biological clock; instead of dating out of a sense of urgency to marry and have kids, you can slow down and ensure that you’re in a relationship for the right reasons. Tell your friends you’re ready to meet someone, and welcome them to set you up."This is primarily because more Baby Boom women are having careers, while their mothers did not.As a result, they will enjoy two pension checks and two social security checks.
Talking about sex is no longer taboo; expect to have these conversations fairly early on in a new dating relationship. Involve your family as much as you feel comfortable, but expect that the politics of death and divorce might have some of them feeling uneasy about you seeing someone new.I may be generalizing but do you see the same thing? If in your 40’s, it seems OK to me to date guys in their 30’s, 40’s or 50’s. Guys in their 30’s are definitely out, guys in the 40’s might work, but they might want women in their 30’s or 40’s, guys in their 50’s definitely want girls in their 30’s or 40’s, and guys in their 60’s are just too old. Being new at this, I’m going to go for just being my Gosh darn self and if someone wants to date me, great, and if they think I’m too old, then so be it. It’s all about believing you have a lot to offer someone, which I do. Note: With the greater prevalence of STDs today, even postmenopausal women should insist on protection during sexual activity. Don’t expect everyone to understand; instead, stand up for yourself with gentleness and grace in those situations. You can still be vibrant and youthful in your fifties and sixties and beyond. Volunteer, take classes, go to church, and spend quality time with good friends.Take care of yourself, live life with purpose, and aim to be someone you’d want to date. If you’re self-assured, prioritizing what matters and pursuing the things you love, you’re living a full life.